Sunday, February 16, 2020

ACE # 13 Scot Schreiner in Kerrville

with our eyes stinging from the cedar pollen wafting mercilessly on the winds,
we could hardly see the ball,
plus that green is uphill a good bit
4 iron, 168 yds, quartering wind from the right hurting was a frozen rope
a west texas wind-cheater
that landed short of the green,
but the little bulldog bounced left away from the trap
tractored up the steep face to the green
and obviously to me rolled toward the cup
but still
the chances seemed minimal
having a terrible round -- 
but that's the way it goes with duffers
they get their aces during bad rounds
me and my witness

the scorecard

i'll update my chart of premium holes later.

Thursday, January 16, 2020

Golfing Papa


Mamie Smith - Golfing Papa
Golfing Dan was a golfing man
He'd golf morn til night
He had a mama, a loving mama
He didn't treat her right
He come home all tired out
And right to bed he go
His mama soon got tired of this
And these words she whisperd low

Golfin' Papa, you're way over par
You'll have to stop puttin' on the green
You had your way on the fairway
You know just what I mean

Now your start is perfect your aim is true
But when you drive you fail to follow through
Golfin' Papa, you're way over par
You'll have to stop puttin' on the green
Use your nibblets
You have to start putting on the green

Now what you need is a golf coach
You're all right on your drive
But bad on your approach
What you want, your mama has got
But son you better practice
You're so ___ on shot

Now listen papa you must learn your stuff
Cause when you drive you fly to go right in the rough
...From paying green fees, you've got me broke!
Your shafts are bent, and now you've lost your master stroke!
So pack your golf bag, you've had your fun
I've found another man who's made a hole in one!

Golfin' Papa, you're way over par
You'll have to stop puttin' on the green
Turn in your golf cart
You'll have to stop puttin' on the green