Janov

The first hole is a par 5 . . . it doesn't look too bad, with the tree guarding the inside of the dogleg and hiding the OB fenceline. . . I staid well away from the right side, so I was in the rough . . . I didn't know it was the rough until I got down to my ball. . . I didn't think it would matter that much, but the grass was wet and heavy, the turf was very inferior . . . just black dirt under patchy grass . . . so I kinda chunked a 7wood down towards the hole, still in the rough, then chunked an 8iron, then chunked a pw, then bladed a chip over the green, and 2 putted for a double bogey . . .

#2 is a short par 3 back up the hill we just sort of sidled down . . .

I didn't swing well, and chunked and bladed more short irons . . .

I'd already lost interest . . . this is a horrible course .  . .with pathetic miniature bunkers and flat greens flush with the fairway, cowpasture turf, and golf mat tees.

#3 might have been a fun hole if I had been in fine fettle and if I could have known what was going on . . . it's sort of a blind tee shot, and short enough that I put the big dog back in the bag and just kinda bladed a 5 iron out to the dog leg . . .

then I thinned a 3iron just short of the green, bladed a chip over the green, chunked the come-backer, and two-putted for a double bogey.

I was resolved on the 2nd time around to just hit the big dog over those trees that show up on the left of this picture . . . if I was loose at all, I could drive this green, I think . . .
But, as it was, in reality, instead, I was thoroughly disgusted with the course, the weather, my long johns, and my ridiculous scoring . . .

#4 is another hole that doesn't look so bad on paper, shortish par 4, uphill, with sharp dogleg right around some trees .. .

trying to get into the spirit of things, and keep the ball on what they called a fairway, I hit a 7wood at the inside corner of the dogleg with a hook back down the hill to the left side, about a 100 m from the green, to leave myself a full club to that green . . . essentially the same shot as the tee shot on #2.

but I pulled it left and long behind one of those mini-skinny-traps . . .

so natcherly I had to chunk it INTO the trap . . . the sand in there wasn't too bad actually, kinda gravelly, but you can actually play it like sand, so fine . . . but it was just another double-bogey for me, in the end . . . those greens were so hideously grainy, they were like temporary greens, impossible to take seriously, tho' I kept trying.

I tho't maybe I'd finally hit a driver solid on the par5 #5, but it didn't go much further than K-taak's pop-up 3wood . . . even tho' it was in the "fairway" the ball had set down in a cuppy lie like it was in the rough . . .

I still tried to hit a 3wood, and skulled it like a duffer.

so went to a 4iron and bladed that about halfway up the hill to the hole . . .
just kept it out and hit it again to get up to the green . . . couldn't really get down to the ball, because of the poor lie, but also because my swing was just out-of-sorts . . . in the misty conditions, I wasnt going to get up and down, and I didn't try.

#6 is a 200m long par 3, and the only pleasure I can take out of it is that I hit my 5wood solid.

with a pull-hook left of the green, but solid.

I used two hands for the lob onto the green, but I putted with one-hand . . . the other was in my pocket to stay warm.

The tee shot for #7 has a classic look to it, uphill to a crest with the green unforeseen, but there's a nasty looking little water hazard on the left side of the fairway . . . meaning a sump-hole of industrial shape and cess-pool size I suppose you're supposed to go right of, as part of a dogleg or something . . . I landed right by it . . . I have no idea how far I was hitting by then . . . nuthin' felt solid and I still seemed to be miles from the green. . .
I fatted a 5iron, then hit a sparkling 9iron pinhigh, left of the green that kicked straight toward the hole . . . a 2 putt bogey . . . my best hole, but no satisfaction. . .
#8 is the one hole I wisht I'd gotten a picture of . . . it was so f*****d up a design it reminded me of the pilzn course we played, only worse: very short par 4 with a 110 degree dogleg left around a huge oak tree . . . I think there were large oak trees all down the left side from the tee that keep you from just cutting the corner straight at the green. I tho't I might hit a high hook over and around that tree -- I don't know why -- but what I got instead was a medium-high hard hook that veered right into the tree. I tho't it might be right under the tree, but what did I see, or what did K-taak show me is that my ball had caromed down the slope straight at the green, 10m short of the green. . . but it was like chipping thru a dog run with all the worm-casts there, so I chunked and bladed and two-putted to a bogey from there. Fine. Just Fine.

You might think #9 is the signature hole from its position, right outside the clubhouse . . . that is, you have to walk past #9 to get to #1, and you get to finish in sight of the clubhouse . . . I guess that's worth something. I hit a week 9iron slice pin high right of the green 30m . . . Hit the only decent pitch shot of the day from there to 3 ft away. Missed the putt. Did not care.

we stopped here for refreshments, and while we dined, it started raining harder . . . we were already caked with mud from the knees down and cold, so we just called it a day.

We had gone to Janov with coupons we'd gotten for placing in the last tournament in Motol . . . in fact we had 6 coupons in all, so we had planned on free 18s, but with those conditions, free 9s was plenty. The part that grated on me was driving 5 hours to play 2 1/2 hours of bad golf, shooting the whole day . . . there's not many days of golf I will admit to have been a total waste, but this is one of 'em. . . 8^/ . . . the weather conditions sucked, the playing conditions sucked, and my physical condition sucked . . . so a new rule of thumb . . . 3 sucks and you're out . . .